In this post, I talked about how
ugly unattractive dudes are nabbing the hottest chicks in America. Heavyweight filmmaker Brett Ratner is getting some prime muscular booty from tennis goddess Serena Williams and Mickey Mouse-looking rap mogul Jermaine Dupri is squeezing up on Janet "Damita Jo" Jackson.
But I almost vomited when I read this: According to gossip columnist Jawn Murray, crunk master Lil Jon is dating R&B cutie-pie Mya. Whuuuaat?!?!?
This has to be a mistake. Lil Jon is skeet-skeet-skeet skeeting on Mya's booty?
What the hell is going on here?!?!?
No disrespect to Lil Jon, but he's a
nasty-looking unattractive dude. Saucy dame Angelique is my witness.
If these three scrubs can get the hottest chicks in the biz, it's about time I step up my game and approach some of Hollywood’s top hotties.
Halle Berry -- Holla at cha boy!
Jennifer Lopez -- Ola at cha papi!
Ki Toy Johnson -- I like the way you move!
Oh wait a minute, Jennifer Lopez is so desperate for a man she allegedly stole another woman's husband. The multi-tasking Latina reportedly is banging salsa crooner Marc Anthony. And let's keep it real; Marc is not an attractive-looking man either. Dang!
I can't understand it. How are these ugly dudes nabbing the hottest chicks on the block?
I better holla at an older chick like Vivica A. Fox -- she is looking very scrumptious inside the pages of the current issue of Smooth magazine. But the Kill Bill, Vol. 1 star needs to take it easy on the plastic surgery. Those nip tucks are making her face look swollen.
But on the real, yo. What the hell is going on? Why are these hot babes hooking up with ugly dudes? It has to be the money and the power (aka "the bling-bling" thing) because clearly it's not about the looks.
Can someone please explain this phenomenon to me?
I watched Janet Jackson's appearance on NBC's Saturday Night Live over the weekend. I think the R&B songbird did a pretty good job considering that all of the sketches she was featured in were not funny. Janet is not a comedic actress, so I wasn't expecting any laugh-out-loud moments from her.
But the whole show was a complete bore. The much-ballyhooed sketch of Janet portraying U.S. National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice at the Sept. 11 Commission hearing didn't make me laugh. Yes, Janet indeed flashed a digitally-airbrushed breast, but is that really funny? And The Good Times sketch near the end of the show only aroused a chuckle from me.