Monday Meme: Looney Tunes
To The Heavens, Blackwards

Late Night . . .


I had another one of those crazy dreams . . . again.


This time, I dreamt that I was named the replacement host of the Late Show with David Letterman on CBS.

Apparently, Dave was stepping down from his titular post of late night television and the producers of the show were looking for a fresh new face -- particularly an African-American face.

So who did they call?

Me.

The phone started ringing, so I picked up the phone and the Last Show producer was on the other line.

Producer: Mr. Fitzgerald?
Me: Yes.
Producer: Hi. We wanted to inform you that we have chosen you to become the new host of the Late Show after Dave leaves.
Me (in shock): Sure . . . No problem. I'm ready to go.
I hanged up the phone and started jumping up and down.
I told my whole family and they were thrilled. I told my mom that I'm the new host for the Late Show and my mom was simply ecstatic -- and she started jumping up and down.

I couldn't believve it, I have finally reached stardom. It's time to get paid!

I said to myself, 'I will become the first African-American host of a major late-night show. This is history in the making, baby!'
(Yeah, I know Aresenio Hall did it first, but he fucked up, it's my turn now.)

So I started planning out my show -- from my monologue to my first guest (Taraji P. Henson) to my first musical act (T.I. -- live performance of "What You Know").

But there seems to be one small problem . . .

When will I start on the show?

I tried to call the producers, but I didn't have their telephone number. I kept asking myself, "How were the producers able to contact me?"
I looked all around my house and I couldn't find the number?
I'm like, 'When am I supposed to begin my gig as host of the Late Show?'

No one knew. Fuck! What am I supposed to do?

Now this is when the dream gets really bizarre.

Even though I didn't know when I was supposed to start work at my new job, I walked into my old job to inform by boss of my resignation. After that, I walked around the office with a serious swagger. I told everyone there to 'Kiss my ass and watch me at 11:35 pm every night. Bitches.'

I then booked appointments to get a pedicure and a manicure. I also booked an appointment for full a spa treatment: facials, hair removal -- the whole 9 nine yards. I even booked an appointment for a colon cleaning. I also set up a dentist appointment, as well.

Yep, your boy was getting ready for late night television. I was stepping my game up --- big time! Then, after that, I get another call.

Guess what?

Funnyman Dave Chappelle is coming out of his self-imposed retirement to be the executive producer of my show. I was like, 'Holy shit! It's on and poppin'! Fuck the Arsenio Hall Show, I'm going to revolutionize last night television!'

But then Dave asks me this question:

Dave: So when does the show start?
Me: Ummm? Good question. Soon. But don't worry about that. I want Charlie Murphy and Donnell Rawlings (aka "ashy man") to be my Senior Writers for the show and I want you to pay them top dollar!

I was so excited to host my own show, but I kept wondering, 'when am I supposed to start the show?'

I kept pacing back and forth . . . back and forth.

When am I supposed to start the show?
When am I supposed to start the show?

And then I woke up.

I had fallen asleep on my couch. I look around my living room and was like, 'Shiiiit.'

Man, you don't know how depressed I was after realizing that in the end . . . it was all a dream.

Shit.

I hope dreams come true.

But on the real . . . what did this dream really mean?


[EDIT]
My girl Saucy Dame recently offered her two cents on what my dream really meant. I figured I would share it with my readers -- maybe you can relate.
To wit:

When am I supposed to start the show?
When am I supposed to start the show?

I think this is how a lot of us feel. When does my real life begin? When does the fun start? When am I finally going to make my arrival? Can I live?

Your dream stems from your inner desire to be the "MAN" . . . to live "GOOD". Even though you're shy -- there is a desire for you to be SEEN, RECOGNIZED and RESPECTED as a powerful man.

"Then booked appointments to get a pedicure and a manicure. I also booked an appointment for full a spa treatment: facials, hair removal -- the whole 9 nine yards. I even booked an appointment for a colon cleaning. I also set up a dentist appointment, as well. "

True Virgo -- without missing a beat -- you have it all planned out, right down to the cleanliness of your butthole. LOL!
-- Saucy Dame

[EDIT]


Holla!

Tags:

Comments