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Posts from February 2008

Servin' In The Kitchen

Fall back Rachael Ray, there's someone out there that's even more kookier than you in the kitchen -- it's Coolio.

The rapper, who's mostly known for bastardizing Stevie Wonder's "Pastime Paradise" with his 1995 Grammy-winning hit "Gangsta Paradise," has launch his own online cooking show called Cookin' with Coolio on the My Damn Channel network. The program is schedule to air every Wednesdays.

Coolio is gonna teach "yo ass how to cook," especialy if your girlfriend is "one of those salad-eating bitches."

It's time to cook, beeyotch.

In episode one, Coolio prepares a tasty Caprese salad that, according to the culinary rapper, is "better than yo momma's titties."

Now remember: "If it look good, taste good, smell good . . . is good. Shaka Zuluuuu!"

Watch the show HERE.

This is some ignorant funny shit.


Coolio (featuring LV) -- "Gangsta Paradise" (Music Video)

Shaka Zulu!

Lyte Reading

Humanity Critic recently posted a funny yet hip-hop-related story of an after-sex conversation he and his girlfriend had on the subject of the "Greatest Female Hip-Hop Album Of All Time." It's a great read and I submitted this write-up as a candidate for the "Best Music Writing 2008."

Humanity Critic seemed to frown at Salt-N-Pepa's first album, Hot, Cool & Vicious, as being the "Greatest Female Hip-Hop Album Of All Time," but I think that for most people it's the most obvious choice, plus, it's a damn good album. Also, S-N-P's A Salt With a Deadly Pepa is an underrated classic in my book.

However, Humanity Critic's pick was Queen Latifah's debut LP, All Hail the Queen, which also is a great rap album.

HumanityCritic: I'd have to go with Queen Latifah's All Hail the Queen. As strongly as I feel that she should never recite poetry over beats again, I'm pretty confident that her debut album is the best female Hip Hop album of all time.

The Girlfriend: Damn, good choice: "Wrath of my Madness," "Mama Gave Birth to the Soul Children," "Dance For Me" -- you don't get much of an argument here.

HumanityCritic: I knew there was a reason I liked you.

The Girlfriend: If you liked me so much, you'd stop reciting Kool G Rap lyrics in my ear while we're fucking.

HumanityCritic: I don't like you that much.

Aww, now that's love.

My overall pick of the "Greatest Female Hip-Hop Album Of All Time" goes to MC Lyte's 1988 debut LP, Lyte As a Rock. It was a collection that boasts two of my favorite bangers, "Paper Thin" and the title track. I also had a HUGE crush on the gold doorknocker earrings-wearing, perm-hairstyle having femcee[sic], as well.

I loved the line on "Paper Thin":
"Maybe we'll kiss on the fifth or sixth date/
Then when we meet -- muuuwaah/
Because a date without kiss is just so incomplete/
And then maybe, I'll let you play with my feet."

I have a fetish for women's feet so sucking on MC Lyte's toes wouldn't have been a dream come true, and quite tasty. But I digress . . .

I have a little story to tell:

In 1987, I went to a "Stay in School" jam that featured MC Lyte as the headliner. I vowed to myself that I was going to attend that show and asked MC Lyte to be my girlfriend.
**Keep in mind that I was a prepubescent and hormonal 17-year-old rap head looking to get laid by anyone and anything.**

I attended the concert and I was standing front-and-center waiting for the love of my life to hit the stage. And there she was -- doorknocker earrings and all -- MC Lyte. Long story short, the Brooklyn rapstress rocked the show.

But during Lyte's performance, she decided to step onto the edge of the stage and perform "Paper Thin." When she did that, I grabbed a hold of her leg and proceeded to massage her extremity as I looked lovingly into her eyes. As I moved up from her muscular leg to the back of her thigh, our eyes met. Lyte looked a little worried -- scratch that -- she was uncomfortable with me rubbing on her leg. And then with one swift swoop, Lyte pressed her sneaker on my forehead and kicked the shit out of me. Now that was a "10% 100% Dis."

After that, my schoolboy crush for MC Lyte was quickly distinguished. The L-Y-T-E wasn't feeling ya boy.

But I did come home with a souvenir after the concert. When I looked in the mirror . . .

MC Lyte's dusty sneaker footprint was clearly visible on my forehead.

Now that's love.

MC Lyte -- "When In Love" (Music Video)

MC Lyte -- "Paper Thin" (Music Video)

MC Lyte -- "Ruff Neck" (Music Video)

MC Lyte -- "Wonder Years" (Music Video)


This One Is For Dilla

"Hip-hop is bigger than religion . . . hip-hop is bigger than the government . . . this one is for Dilla, hip-hop . . . "
-- "The Healer," E. Badu

Erykah Badu's upcoming disc, New Amerykah: Part I (Fourth World War), hits stores on Feb. 26.

Check out this VIDEO of Erykah remembering her dear friend J Dilla, whose production is featured on E. Badu's upcoming collection.

On her new LP:

"First of all, I'm a hip-hop head. For this album, I went deep into the bottom of my hip-hop purse to pull out some of the most creative, scientific, mathematical producers that I could find because that's what I was feeling at the time. I started to dabble in quantum physics because I wanted to really participate in the changing of frequencies in different areas of music. This whole project is a platform for some of these producers. It features tracks by various underground hip-hop producers who all have a reputation for being visionaries. I felt like it was time to put together a project that not only takes listeners to another dimension but also highlights these amazing scientists." (via Clutch Magazine)

So her album is going to be like a science project? Cool!


"Flash" Back

Kanye West (featuring Dwele) -- "Flashing Lights" (Music Video)

I love this video. The clip was co-directed by 'Ye and Spike Jonze, and filmed in Denmark.

Some folks believe that this is just an ordinary video.
But I disagree. Kanye doesn't just shoot ordinary videos. He always tries to bring something fresh and new.

I'm willing to bet you that this entire video sequence was filmed backwards in real time.

Yep. Everything that you are watching in this clip was shot backwards.

Spike Jonze did it the first time in Pharcyde's 1996 music video for "Drop." In that clip, all of the Pharcyde members are performing everything backwards, including walking and reciting their own rhymes.

So with this video, Spike and 'Ye up the ante. And it's brilliant. Simple yet innovative.

This is one of the best music videos of the year next to Snoop Dogg's psychedelic throwback clip for "Sensual Seduction."

Kanye West is a Hip-Hop Genius.